You have been accused of domestic violence by your soon-to-be former spouse. You may believe that you have not done anything wrong, but that your ex is using domestic violence allegations to justify ending the marriage.
What concerns you, however, is that the two of you have children together. You are hoping to have both physical and legal child custody rights, even if you have to share those rights with your ex. If you end up being convicted on domestic violence charges, is this going to affect your ability to get custody of your children?
It can have a significant impact
Yes. A domestic violence conviction can limit or stop you from getting custody of your children. Even without a conviction, allegations of domestic violence can still have a major impact on custody decisions.
A conviction isn’t always an automatic legal bar, but courts put the children’s safety and well‑being first. Any criminal conviction can factor into this equation, particularly those of a violent nature.
If the court believes that it would be dangerous for your children to be with you, they are unlikely to grant you physical custody rights. Your co-parent may get sole custody. You may not be able to see the children, or you may have to settle for supervised visitation.
It is also important to consider whether the domestic violence accusations came with a temporary or final restraining order under New Jersey’s Prevention of Domestic Violence Act. Family courts can modify parenting time orders and may allow supervised visitation or exchanges under controlled conditions even when safety concerns exist, but only after careful review and subject to the terms of any protective order.
What can you do?
If you have history of domestic violence, there are some ways you may be able to improve your standing in family court:
- Follow protective orders and court requirements
- Complete court‑ordered programs and voluntary counseling
- Maintain stable housing and employment
- Gather documented evidence of parenting involvement and character references
- Avoid harassing contact or social‑media posts.
These actions may reduce the court’s safety concerns and improve your chances of obtaining or increasing parenting time or custody. However, they do not guarantee a particular outcome. Speaking with an attorney about your options and rights in this difficult situation can be crucial for your parenting future.